Halloween just passed and it was a bust. No one showed up to my house to trick or treat which still has me really sad regardless of the fact that Halloween was like four days ago. Consequently though, I have tons of candy all to myself. As I sit here eating my mini packages of Sour Patch Kids I find myself hoping that when I reach into a bag I find only certain colored ones… which sparked this idea.
Without further ado, I present to you my Sour Patch Kids ranking list:
5. Yellow
Ranking out of 1 (worst) to 5 (best) = 1
Yellow is lemon and lets face it, when has anyone ever gravitated towards a lemon flavored thing especially when there are options available? I have never once heard of someone’s favorite candy being something lemon flavored. It just is not good. Every time I reach into a bag of Sour Patch Kids I always have hope that I won’t pull out a yellow and when I do a wave of disappoint comes over me.
(Also a little counter intuitive since they are called Sour Patch Kids but lemon is sour. I am not a fan of sour things and lemon flavor just makes it worse.)
4. Orange
Ranking out of 1 (worst) to 5 (best) = 1.5
Not going to lie, orange is pretty much just as bad as lemon but I think my Floridian roots tell me that I can’t possibly put orange at the bottom. I personally feel like orange is one of those flavors where they just need another flavor and orange is a nice contrast color and flavor from the berry ones. It doesn’t matter that orange stinks, it only matters that they have variety. Orange is the other Sour Patch where I don’t think anyone can soberly, in-the-right-state-of-mind say “Wow, orange is my favorite Sour Patch!”
The thing about orange is that it is a GREAT accent flavor but it has to be paired with something that has a strong, good taste in the first place. When it is by itself it just isn’t the best. I mean, orange flavored chocolate? AMAZING. Orange vanilla Coca-Cola? A little weird at first but pretty dang good afterwards. Orange flavor by itself? Not quite hitting the mark.
3. Green
Ranking out of 1 (worst) to 5 (best) = 3
I am actually surprised that I like green this much considering green = lime in the Sour Patch world. Maybe I like it this much because I am a GIANT key lime pie fan? Regardless, I think of green as a solid 3. It isn’t bad but it isn’t great… it is just a solid one to fall back on. I don’t really have much to say about it. If I were to pull a green Sour Patch Kid out of the bag then I will genuinely have no emotion towards it. My reaction would be “Oh okay. Cool.”
2. Red
Ranking out of 1 (worst) to 5 (best) = 4.5
Red, which is cherry flavored, used to be my favorite but then a new ~blue~ sheriff came into town causing red to slide into second. No matter what candy it is (except cinnamon candy because cinnamon is gross), red is always going to be good. Everyone likes red and I hear people all of the time say that red is their favorite. I think the only thing that would make the red Sour Patch Kid better was if it did not have the sour stuff on it… but then it would just be a kid shaped Swedish Fish. Honestly, I’d be okay with that because Swedish Fish is my all time favorite candy. So so good.
1. Blue
Ranking out of 1 (worst) to 5 (best) = 5
The winner is blue raspberry!!! I don’t care what anyone says, this blue Sour Patch Kid is perfection. Everyone else I know also agrees with blue being the best which is good because that is the correct view. I have yet to come across someone who does not like blue. It is just a quality flavor. Anything could be flavored blue raspberry and it would be fantastic. Making this flavor was the best move the candy people could have ever done and they know it because they did a promotion where bags of “just red” and “just blue” were sold. I tried so hard but I was not able to find them anywhere. No place around me sold them and I was extremely disappointed. One day I will find these bags and all will be right in the world.
Photos: https://vegfaqs.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/01/sour-patch-kids.jpg , https://s3.amazonaws.com/secretsaucefiles/photos/images/000/118/809/large/SAM_3826-e1429539522641.jpg?1485466193 , https://o.aolcdn.com/images/dims3/GLOB/crop/938×615+174+2/resize/1028×675!/format/jpg/quality/85/https%3A%2F%2Fs.yimg.com%2Fos%2Fcreatr-uploaded-images%2F2019-06%2Fc061e2e0-99bd-11e9-bff7-55ae24a55efa
Thoughts About Nothing 
The order from worst to best is definitely green then yellow then orange then either red or blue depending on the day
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I can respect that opinion as long as blue stays at the top. I seriously only think I like green that much because of my key lime pie obsession.
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